When I Look Back to When Ivy Was Born, It Was One of the Happiest Times of My Life

Welcoming a baby into the world is a moment filled with joy and hope. For me, the birth of Ivy was a dream come true after five long years of trying to conceive. I remember the overwhelming feeling of finally holding her in my arms. It was pure happiness. Yet, soon after, I was met with advice that confused me. People told me not to hold her too much, warning that she might get used to it. I thought, “Get used to what? Being comforted and loved?”

This post is about those early days, the advice I received, and why I believe every parent should trust their instincts when it comes to holding and comforting their baby.

The Pressure to Follow Advice About Holding Your Baby

When Ivy was born, I was a first-time parent. I wanted to do everything right, so I listened carefully to what others said. Friends, family, and even healthcare professionals told me not to hold Ivy too much. They said it would spoil her or make her dependent. This advice felt strange to me. I wanted to comfort my baby, to hold her close when she cried or needed reassurance.

Many of these messages come from a time when parenting was very different. The old idea was that children should be seen and not heard. This outdated belief still influences some advice today. But it doesn’t fit with what we now understand about babies’ needs.

Close-up of a baby sleeping peacefully in a parent's arms

Holding your baby close can bring comfort and security.

Why Holding Your Baby Matters

Babies are born needing comfort and connection. Holding them helps them feel safe. It supports their emotional development and builds trust. When a baby cries, it’s their way of communicating. Responding with love and care helps them learn that the world is a safe place.

I found that holding Ivy often helped her settle and sleep better. It was not about spoiling her but about meeting her needs. This approach also helped me feel more confident as a parent.

The Role of Healthcare Professionals and Sleep Advice

One surprising fact I learned is that many healthcare professionals and GPs do not receive training about sleep as part of their core education. This means the advice they give often comes from what they were told when they were young parents or from outdated parenting books.

This lack of training can lead to mixed messages. Parents might hear conflicting advice about sleep and holding their babies. It’s important to remember that every baby is different. What works for one family might not work for another.

Finding Gentle Sleep Support That Works for You

After struggling with conflicting advice, I found support through gentle sleep solutions that respected both my needs and Ivy’s. One helpful resource was the Teach To Sleep programme. It offers personalised guidance without pushing strict routines or cry-it-out methods. This approach helped us find a balance that worked for our family.

If you’re looking for gentle sleep support, consider options that focus on your baby’s cues and your family’s rhythm. For example, the Teach To Sleep programme provides tailored advice that respects your parenting style and your baby’s needs.

Eye-level view of a calm nursery with soft lighting and a comfortable crib

Creating a calm sleep environment supports gentle sleep routines.

Products That Can Help Support Gentle Sleep

In our journey, a few products made a real difference in helping Ivy feel secure and comfortable:

• Baby Sleep Sacks: These provide warmth and comfort without the risks of loose blankets. They help babies feel snug and safe, which can ease the transition to sleep.

  
  

• White Noise Machines: Gentle sounds can soothe babies and mask household noises that might wake them.

  
  

• Swaddles: For newborns, swaddling can recreate the feeling of the womb, helping them settle more easily.

  
  

Using these products alongside personalised sleep advice can create a supportive environment for your baby’s sleep.

Trusting Your Own Instincts as a Parent

The most important lesson I learned is to trust myself. While advice from others can be helpful, it should never replace your own judgement. You know your baby best. If holding your baby feels right, then do it. If you want to try a gentle sleep programme, go for it.

Remember, parenting is not one-size-fits-all. Your choices should be based on what feels right for you and your baby, not on outdated advice or pressure from others.

High angle view of a parent gently rocking a baby to sleep in a cosy room

Gentle rocking and holding can help babies feel secure and loved.

Moving Forward with Confidence

Looking back, I wish I had known more about gentle sleep support and trusted my instincts sooner. But every parent learns as they go. If you’re feeling unsure, seek out resources that respect your family’s needs and values.

The journey of parenthood is full of learning and growth. Holding your baby as much as you want is a beautiful way to build a strong bond. It’s okay to question advice and choose what feels right for you.

If you want to explore gentle sleep solutions, the Teach To Sleep programme is a great place to start. It helped me and Ivy find peaceful nights without stress or tears.

Holding your baby is a personal choice. It should be based on love, comfort, and your unique family needs. Don’t let outdated advice make you doubt the simple joy of holding your child close.

This post is for informational purposes only and does not replace professional medical advice.